In Soviet Russia...

***TH leaves conversation***
ND: okay now that TH is not here
ND: shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker tits
Me: I'm going to get in trouble for that one!
Me: I spit up coffee laughing when I read it
KK: Just steal your bosses porsche and escape
Me: He drove the Jag in today
KK: steal it!
Me: a new kind of game night
KK: steal them all!!!
KK: then...profit
ND: crime doesn't pay KK
KK: but it does in the short term
ND: get thee to wall street!
Me: or at least outta eA!
Me: steal boss's car, real life GTA!
ND: I call helicopter!
GT: i call tank
KK: steal boss' car and punch a hooker
KK: then real life GTA
ND: can I get the hooker to punch me?
KK: in soviet russia hooker punches you
ND: brb going to russia
Me: the safety word is more
Me: or harder
GT: didnt the slap chop guy get punched by a hooker
ND: the who?
GT: Slap chop guy
ND: who?
GT: billie mays' competitor...fierce competitor
ND: oh ShamWoW
GT: is that his name
Me: shamwow guy!
ND: shamanwow?
ND: I cna't type WoW without that capitalization anymore T_T
ND: the crack it is mighty (that's what she said HIYOOOO)
KK: So anyone coming over for game night? we're trying to get a tally
GT: only if its twister!
KK: the twister mat smells like baby oil
GT: get the water hose
ND: water and oil don't mix, G
ND: that is why you cannot use a water based lubricant in the shower
Me: damn!
Me: that's why!
Me: or in the pool
ND: yeah, but then chlorine gets into places
KK: only if you're small
KK: if there's no more room then you're fine, it makes a complete seal
ND: no, if you leave them gaping they may leak in reverse
KK: not my problem at that point
GT: is that a reverse drowning??
KK: nice
ND: I call it a preemptive abortion
KK: so much better than mouth-to-mouth
ND: especially when they spit